MUSIC VIDEO PREMIERE for NIGHTSHADE

SEE THE PREMIERE on THE DELI MAGAZINE

The song Nightshade is a conversation between an older self, appearing to divulge one bit of insight from the future to a younger self, who then responds and explodes in revelation.

This film begins as Super 8mm, on a very windy night out on a pier on Chicago’s north shoreline. Eryka Dellenbach, a (brand new at the time) friend, now close friend, was in town the day of my book signing, and we decided to lope off after and make a video for one of my songs… Nightshade.

I’ll have to post the whole story later as a video, but basically, I shot one roll of the film and did the rest in digital, which ended up not getting backed up somehow on a wonky external hard drive and having to go through so many avenues to get anything recovered — the footage I was able to recover (with help from Aaron Delani) I had to actually re-film as it played on my laptop because it was too corrupted to directly edit. The most stunning shot in the film, when Eryka plants her feet and receives the force of a GIANT wave was actually a phone video of the original that I had taken out of sheer excitement before tragedy struck… thankfully!!

I was so determined out of sheer heartbreak and shame that I would not take no for an answer — and frankly, in the end, got a film that fits the song more perfectly than I ever could have planned. It was a good reminder in many ways, both pragmatic and in the sense that chaos will come into your plans and your life no matter how prepared you think you are - you may as well invite it and make a space for it. Which, is, essentially what this record is all about. AND! Now I know how to make this kind of footage ON PURPOSE for future projects, heh!

"Today @marencelest released a time capsule charged with powerful healing energy. Last Fall, she invited me to a northerly beach pier in Chicago to dance under the moon and through some fast chilly air to her song Nightshade. I was just getting to know Maren then and since we’ve cultivated a close friendship through magical, transformative encounters often involving creative, collaborative endeavors. For this piece I donned a red, monochrome outfit of hers (see image 2) that we left to dry in the morning sun. She gave me a beautiful quilted blanket to warm myself that lays over my red couch at home. I do believe that deliberate, creative work has the power to heal us, and others. The night this film was shot, my heart was breaking and my gums had stitches in them ♥️ Our work also has the power to sever & crack us open!" ~ Eryka Dellenbach on making Nightshade

Big thank you to Eryka, Corey, Kate, Dan, Daniel, Dave, Kyle, Lag and Aaron.

...off of the new album from Maren Celest, I SAW THE SUN ~ with movement by Eryka Dellenbach.

(download code for full digital album comes with book+7"vinyl):

http://www.candorarts.com/goods/i-saw-the-sun-vinyl

(shot on Kodak Vision 50d Super 8mm film developed at cinelab - up til 3:15)

For more on how this film was made: www.marencelest.com/newness

@marencelest / @erykadellenbach on instagram.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Original Song (baritone uke) and lyrics written by Maren Celest,

cello & cello parts by Kate Barutha,

bass & bass parts by Dan Haefs,

drums & drum parts by Daniel Villarreal-Carrillo,

guitar & zither parts by Corey Allbritten,

recorded & mixed by Corey Allbritten,

final mix by David Vettraino,

mastered by Kyle Vegter.

- NIGHTSHADE -

"NIGHTSHADE"
I SAW THE SUN, the full album, is coming in APRIL.

Pre-order: www.candorarts.com/goods

The song Nightshade features the cello work of Kate Barutha, the percussion of Daniel Villarreal-Carrillo , the bass work of Dan Haefs and E. Guitar and Toy Italian Harp by Corey Allbritten, who also recorded and mixed this song — mastered by Kyle Vegter.

Above is a piece of spiritual jewelry I made out of aluminum wire, meant to hold a bough of nightshade inches from ones' face. This plant is devastatingly beautiful but invasive and poisonous; deep green with purple flowers that turn into multi-colored berries. I am wearing it like this because I feel that we as a society are too detached from our mortality, and the truth therein. Death and the truth are common denominators - one seeks us all and the other we must seek, actively, and constantly, because it is not static. Mortality is a strong unifier and catalyst I've found, and the upside of grief is that sometimes it can be a deep and mysterious motivator, and that it can gift us with profound appreciation for our loved ones and our own existence. I'm not saying that it's not terrifying or not hard or not sad. I've been in a weird vortex of grieving pretty privately for years. I'm saying that no one is ever, ever alone in this regard. So much of death is a shared experience. And that death is there for a reason, both literally and figuratively. Death is truth, and truth brings death to illusion and often, ego. The shared experience of literal death brings empathy, and so often empathy is the revealer of truth.  .  .... So, I wear this bough of poisonous nightshade when it is time to stop seeking comfort, when it's time to face death and remember: that which is not love is fear, but even in fear there is an opportunity for empathy, which is fear's alchemy to become love once again.    .    LYRICS    All the time that you thought it could wait    the thing that you love was escapin’ right out the back gate    And all the time that you thought you just waste    You’re actually building a throne for the thing that you hate    A-a-a-a-ll the things you thought I wasn’t capable of    A-a-a-all the things I thought I wasn’t capable of.   .  Sidenote : I have been inspired and turned onto the notion of a “death doula” by my friend and fellow artist, Emily Cross (see:  Cross Record  /  LOMA  ) (who happens to also be a visual - musician - artist - scorpio - person and co-produced Petrichor on my 7”). I am thinking that later in life, I might go down that path, to be there for and to sometimes even guide those who are nearing the end of their own life or a loved ones’. We all have our own truths to help reveal, even as they change, to the world — no one should feel lesser than for their, and mine may be as a death doula, eventually. For now it is as an artist, but frankly, the individualism of my art is bothering me, even now. Community and sustainability and inclusiion is to be valued and glorified as much as independence and beauty in its many easily seen or mainstream forms. Anyway, just thinking out loud here.  Love you. Wanna be better all the time, what ever that may mean. Let’s do our best to not be afraid.

Above is a piece of spiritual jewelry I made out of aluminum wire, meant to hold a bough of nightshade inches from ones' face. This plant is devastatingly beautiful but invasive and poisonous; deep green with purple flowers that turn into multi-colored berries. I am wearing it like this because I feel that we as a society are too detached from our mortality, and the truth therein. Death and the truth are common denominators - one seeks us all and the other we must seek, actively, and constantly, because it is not static. Mortality is a strong unifier and catalyst I've found, and the upside of grief is that sometimes it can be a deep and mysterious motivator, and that it can gift us with profound appreciation for our loved ones and our own existence. I'm not saying that it's not terrifying or not hard or not sad. I've been in a weird vortex of grieving pretty privately for years. I'm saying that no one is ever, ever alone in this regard. So much of death is a shared experience. And that death is there for a reason, both literally and figuratively. Death is truth, and truth brings death to illusion and often, ego. The shared experience of literal death brings empathy, and so often empathy is the revealer of truth.
.
.... So, I wear this bough of poisonous nightshade when it is time to stop seeking comfort, when it's time to face death and remember: that which is not love is fear, but even in fear there is an opportunity for empathy, which is fear's alchemy to become love once again.

.

LYRICS

All the time that you thought it could wait

the thing that you love was escapin’ right out the back gate

And all the time that you thought you just waste

You’re actually building a throne for the thing that you hate

A-a-a-a-ll the things you thought I wasn’t capable of

A-a-a-all the things I thought I wasn’t capable of.

.

Sidenote : I have been inspired and turned onto the notion of a “death doula” by my friend and fellow artist, Emily Cross (see: Cross Record / LOMA ) (who happens to also be a visual - musician - artist - scorpio - person and co-produced Petrichor on my 7”). I am thinking that later in life, I might go down that path, to be there for and to sometimes even guide those who are nearing the end of their own life or a loved ones’. We all have our own truths to help reveal, even as they change, to the world — no one should feel lesser than for their, and mine may be as a death doula, eventually. For now it is as an artist, but frankly, the individualism of my art is bothering me, even now. Community and sustainability and inclusiion is to be valued and glorified as much as independence and beauty in its many easily seen or mainstream forms. Anyway, just thinking out loud here.

Love you. Wanna be better all the time, what ever that may mean. Let’s do our best to not be afraid.

Music Video and Album Artwork for ALTAMIRA

Video made with assistance by Melissa Musseau and Diana Bowden

-::-

The song Evergreen is featured on Darts & Arrows' album Altamira on ears&eyes records (2015). It was written by Bill MacKay. Bill MacKay, guitar Ben Boye, keys Kyle Hernandez, bass Quin Kirchner, drums Renee Baker, viola Nick Mazzarella, alto sax

billmackay.com

billmackay.bandcamp.com earsandeyesrecords.com earsandeyesrecords.bandcamp.com

Album artwork / 35mm